Ups and Downs

Recently I've been more and more aware of the ups and downs of motherhood... mainly because until recently I've been on a down. Not that I was way down... I wasn't hating being a mom or anything..I had just been letting the stress of being a full-time student and a mother get to me. Which is ok.. it is very difficult.. and I do have a right to feel stressed out. And I actually think it's important to acknowledge those feelings... they are real and honest and natural... motherhood is difficult sometimes. But lately I just can't seem to get enough of my daughter... I love her so much! I find myself thinking about her while I'm at school and wondering what she is doing. I miss her when I'm at home for lunch and she isn't here. I usually end up tiptoeing around my apartment because it feels like she is here but is just taking a nap.. but she isn't. I even miss her when she is asleep. And when she is awake I can't stop hugging her and kissing her and playing with her. I just can't soak up enough Lilly!

I was reading a book today called "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" and it was talking about temperaments of toddlers and it said that most children can be categorized in 3 ways... They are usually either easy, shy, or spirited. Lilly is 100% spirited! And I love it so much. I try to take life everyday with a passion... I believe if you are going to feel something... feel it all the way and explore that feeling... I believe you learn more about yourself if you do that. So I'm thrilled that my daughter is the same way.

Of course this means that her downs are way down... we deal with it all... moodiness, tantrums, screaming, misbehaving, rebellion, crying, drama, drama, drama.... and not even just a little bit. When she is unhappy EVERYONE knows it and she will tell the world about it! But it also means that her ups are WAY up! She is the happiest child I know! When she is happy she giggles and sings and dances and kisses and loves... it brings me so much joy!

Today when we got home I couldn't help but bundle up my little and take her outside to splash in the puddles. Daddy was worried about dirty socks and shoes, but they can be cleaned so I don't worry about those little things.

There is something intuitive in a child that sees a puddle and naturally splashes in it.